Of all things, before all else, I must issue a sincere and heartfelt condemnation to royalists that identify themselves as leftists or liberals. There is nothing liberal or democratic about monarchy, whatever it has done or hasn’t done. Any person who calls themselves a leftist and a monarchist is like a black member of the Ku Klux Klan—an idiot undergoing an identity crisis. One can’t be the upholder of democratic ideals and of an inherently evil and unnecessary institution that is at the core of all the inconsistent whinings about imperialism and colonialism we Canadians have always attributed against the Americans. Republics can correct themselves while monarchies cannot and won’t. Royalists, whatever political stripe, either hate democracy or are too stupid or insane (in some cases both) to realize monarchy is an evil affront to democracy and will fight tooth and nail to prevent it. I also want to issue a goddamned slap in the face to all the cowards and cop-outs that conjure up all sorts of excuses to not end the damned institution and end it now. “Let’s wait til it passes; let’s wait til Prince Charles takes the throne.” Then what? Suppose nothing happens? Do we wait until he dies and his offspring or another relative of his assumes power after him? Such a stupid cop-out based on the assumption that we should just sit still and wait til the universe or our elected “representatives” entertain the idea of tackling the head of state, despite the constitutional risk. Speaking of the Constitution, no Canadian has read it, understood it or cared about it, and the wide majority of those who even heard about it are so stupid they don’t know what damned country they’re living in; some people (ordinary folk, the ones Canada’s left miserably fails to reach out to) even believe that the age of consent is eighteen when in fact it’s sixteen (for girls). Things of this importance must be tackled, even if it means having to go through the constitution, which is a bad document anyway, drafted up by London barristers and solicitors who have never been to Canada to begin with. If our constitution is such a headache that it can’t be touched or amended, even when absolutely necessary, then it is a bad constitution that Canada and her people don’t deserve or need, and along with the monarchy, must be abolished and replaced with a republican constitution that emphasizes on the universal values and foundations of freedom, equality, and unity. The current “constitution” (which is really the re-named British North America Act, thus it isn’t Canadian) that we, the dwellers of the British colonial outpost, live under is a total failure, as much of a failure as its fellow rag, the Charter, which doesn’t guarantee serious civil liberties since it’s more of a gesture by the powerful to the people to keep the petty rabble quiet as Canadian nobility, elected and unelected, sit on their hands and do nothing as usual, than a serious curb to government abuses. We think Canada is great because we imagine it is great, deluded by fantasies painted by our governments provincial and federal, and self-deluded, enticed by idiotic ramblings of a few obscure names that no one cares about, such as Wayne Gretzki or Farley Mowat. The Americans rightfully wrenched themselves free from the throngs of the British Empire—a once powerful land-hungry monster (as all empires were and are) that ruined and exploited the natives of their conquered land, including Canada—over more than just taxes (among the other ideas being the stupidity of a continent being governed by a mere island in Europe), and forged themselves an identity based on ideals that were universal, drawing from the ideas of the enlightenment. Canada stayed in the dark, damp safety of its mother’s basement, masturbating to Star Wars porn (which is an American film) while relishing in the problems its brother has to deal with on its own. This author is a proud Canadian but also a patriot, a Canadian separatist. It appreciates American ideas, American innovation, American spirit, but prefers to stay Canadian. How stupid are Canadian royalists and neutrals to assume that Canada would break-up and become part of the US the moment Canada becomes independent? Very stupid. We’re already in a similar position by being part of the Commonwealth of Nations, the skeletal remains of a dead empire. There’s all this horse-shit about sovereignty and independence while sharing the same head of state as other nations . . . the definition of an empire. The bottom line difference between a republican form of government and a monarchy is that the head of state is elected in a republic, and the head of state of a monarchy is not; executive power for the former is transferred by popular choice, regardless of blood or line of birth, and executive power for the latter is transferred by blood and line of birth, regardless of public input. The rest is commentary. Yet these “liberal” royalists and passive “republicans” (the former insanely clever, insane or both; the latter insanely stupid, insane or both) are part of the disease that has ruined, divided, weakened, impoverished and deluded Canada and Canadians (except people in Quebec, who see themselves as real Canadians) for almost 150, dragged into European wars and affairs to preserve and expand the British Empire. English Canadians view and treat all Francophones and Aboriginals as diseased trophies of conquest, and Francophones and Aboriginals regard Anglophones as oppressors. Now, the common stupid leftist will croak: “Regarding foreign wars, we didn’t enter Iraq!” True, but why then should we have a head of state of another country as Britain, which has troops in Iraq?! Why be associated with that? Is it not supreme commander of the armies of Britain and of Canada? Also, we’re in Afghanistan, and despite the horrors unleashed by the godless Taliban when they seized power in 1996, we went in after almost a decade but for a different reason, which hasn’t been found yet thanks to shifting priorities. Another ire that boggles the mind is that these same people, the “liberal” royalists and passive republicans and fence sitters, who claim they were horrified by the sights and action of the G20, where peaceful protesters, journalists and even ordinary people were violently assaulted, harassed, humiliated by Toronto police, the very same police that pussied-out when anarchists and political extremists trashed and rioted in the downtown core for almost two hours, attacking journalists, photographers, videographers, and ordinary people and trashed the windows of not just corporations but also of small businesses—small businesses, propped up by immigrants who came here to find a new place to live and stay—and torched police cars which, according to legend which stayed as a legend, would’ve caused the police to enact some sort of murderous vengeance against them, and other stupid shit, while a group of world leaders sat around for no reason only to make an unimportant statement . . . excused and dismissed the utter callousness and obliviousness to these horrors by the Old Hen and holder of that useless, undemocratic and un-Canadian sinecure who paid a visit minutes after yet another international event Canadians always embarrass themselves in, with a pageantry of mockery that consisted of visiting only a few provinces, opening a human rights museum, and then proclaiming that “Canada is an example of the world,” as “above politics” or “above the world,” without specifying jack-shit other than perhaps meaning she’s so superior that she’s above morality and human responsibility, which is horse-shit. These people, these disgusting utilitarians, like other moanarchists, think that certain human beings should be so above morality, so above irresponsibility solely based on power alone that they somehow have a “right” to do whatever they like, even tyrannical whenever madness, idiocy or cunning demands . . . such is the motto of tyrants and their supporters who suffer from Stockholm syndrome. “Liberal” royalists are just as stupid as other royalists and thus have no place in calling themselves “liberal” or “leftist.” These people who think that monarchy, an undemocratic and antidemocratic institution imposed on Canadians, is somehow in some bizarre compatible with democracy should set sail to England (and yes, let the smart-asses surge forth and attempt to correct me, I dare them damned bastards!) and stay there. Why be so far away from something they love so much?
And what of the rest of the left? Here we are, fighting for causes we can’t and don’t understand, that we assume the business of other nations should be our business while ignoring what happens here. Can we not start change at home first?