Ze BABIES!!!

*beeeeep*

I’ve been a little late on this, I know, but I’ve been preoccupied. Now that time’s on my hands . . .

Late last month, on the 28th of January, one of our beloved PM’s minions unveiled a bill that would change the rules of succession of the British throne by abolishing the requirement of the eldest male child to become next-in-line to the throne, allowing any child first-born, regardless of sex, to become successor. This obviously is an attempt to cash in to the marriage and relationship of Prince William to Kate Middleton, and to make the monarchy popular, which is ironic, considering how undemocratic, anti-democratic and essentially anti-popular monarchy really is. This is something that royalist filth on all sides rejoice in, with left-wing royalists and neo-colonialists who suffer from cognitive dissonance hailing this as a step towards equality (I’m calling you out, Thwap!), while right-wing cancer cells rejoice this as a step in the right direction to appease the ignorant masses with royal pageantry, I honestly couldn’t care less. Whether or not this passes, whether it’s constitutional or not, whether or not first-born children would be allowed to succeed the throne regardless of sex or even sexual orientation (monarchy is anti-gay anyway, with its fixation on heirs and birth-lines and conditioning children to be nothing but next-in-line, even if it means exterminating their ambitions of becoming, say, an astronaut or a doctor), this does not change the fact that monarchy is inherently evil, undemocratic, anti-democratic, elitist, aristocratic, who rules for life, cannot be elected nor removed from office, is at best (or worst) a powerless symbol or at worst a tyrant, and is succeeded by their children regardless of their merit or popular opinion, and that power is inherited, like private property, by blood regardless of popular opinion, rather than earned by ballot, regardless of blood. I don’t care whether or not Kate Middleton is hot. I don’t care if William is hip, of whether he wanted to invite the poor to their wedding, and wanted bike to their wedding. I don’t care if they’re intelligent. The point is I didn’t vote for them, can’t vote for them, because I somehow, for whatever reason, don’t have a right to, as does anyone else.

If you want a female head of state, rather than simply wait until by mere and sheer coincidence and chance one just so happens to be farted out of some royal family member’s womb, just put it to a vote, and vote on the girl with the best and brightest ideas, not the best looks, or the fact that she’s just a girl. There are a lot of ugly people I wouldn’t fuck that I would definitely vote for if they had great ideas and policies, and a lot of pretty people I would definitely have kinky sex with that I would definitely NEVER vote for because of their shitty ideas and policies.

As for you Pommies across the pond, how embarrassed are you? Just how little pride do you have in yourselves, to rely on other “countries” (which are really dominions, colonies that form the skeletal remnants of your once mighty [and evil] empire [as are all empires evil]) to have any say in your monarchy? I mean, come on! Shouldn’t this be Britain’s affair? You’re apprehensive, if not hostile, about the meddlesome nature of the EU, yet somehow you don’t mind countries that are outside the EU, if not far beyond it, to have a say in your affairs? It would be only possible for you to deal with your monarchy alone, if you released your remaining colonies and allowed them to become truly independent, and dissolved your commonwealth.

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